I had only made it to page 41 before I was stopped dead in my tracks. I had to reread the paragraph. I stopped reading, and stared out the window. Ouch. His words had hit me deep within my heart and I was feeling very guilty and extremely convicted....on page 41.
"What do you pray about? Whatever you pray about is what you are hooked into God about, what you are relying on him for. Whatever you don't pray about is what you are trying to do on your own."
I have a lot of surrendering to do today!
After I caught my breath, I continued reading. I only made it through about 10 more pages, and discovered that I was no longer processing these words. The paragraph above was still bouncing around inside my soul.
The dentist appeared to give me an update on A. My fog was lifted and I was shuttled back into the reality of my surroundings. We came home and life resumed. But I was different. Later in the evening Husband even asked if I was alright. He sensed something, but I am sure, didn't know what. I was quiet, reflective, and continued to listen to the Holy Spirit whisper into my soul.
This morning, as I write this post, I am amazed at the work of my Savior. Think of the chain of events:
- Husband randomly chooses a book to give me as a gift
- Book sits on my desk for a few weeks untouched
- I need something to do at the dentist's office
- Book is right in front of me at the computer, so I'll just grab it
- It is a small book, should be an easy read, fits in my purse
- Sit at dental office to enjoy a few quiet moments
- BOOM! The Holy Spirit is in a talkative mood
- My recent prayers have largely consisted of things that I have no control over: health, safety, friends situations, Husband, etc.
- I have not given over to God things that I felt I had under my control: daily schedule, family decisions, involvement in church and community, etc.
- I need more time for reading and reflection.
Wow!! That stopped me dead in my tracks reading it here! Sometimes it only takes the small things!
ReplyDeleteLove that ... I'm looking over my prayer list and seeing some telling things.
ReplyDeleteWow. That's a powerful paragraph. Lots to think about. Thank you for sharing it with us.
ReplyDelete-FringeGirl
Whoa. That stopped me in my tracks too!! Definitely something I need to think about.
ReplyDelete